Isnt’ life strange. Over the last year or so my inner spiritual Self took control over my lower earthly ego by limiting my actions , such as not eating and fasting. The sun has not shined upon me for many months . As a result I have gone pale with a lack of energy and motivation,- not to mention that I am on a Benzodiazepine taper to get me off those damn things that have made me a slave to addiction and sadness.
Withdrawing from Benzodiazepine is the worse. I would rather go through opiate withdrawal for 6 months instead , than 3 days of Benzo withdrawal . This is how bad these pills are. I have been addicted to these ”tranquilizers from Hell ” for about 20 years and they did provide me with comfort and a driving force to get my body in such a relaxed state that allowed me to loosen my astral body from the limitations of this physical body ,which is a prison that presents a big limit for the soul to express itself on the physical plane.
For a couple of years it indeed worked like a charm allowing me to explore various levels of the astral planes during my daily meditations , pouring out my blessings and Goodwill to all mankind. Soon I became addicted to these infernal drugs and always needed more to get to the same level as before during meditation. When I ran out ,- I began to withdraw and it made my life full of hellish nightmares. It then hit me like a bombshell as I would go through withdraws worse than anything I could ever imagine . I needed help for this stupid habit I acquired over the years.
I am now beginning to recover now , but it will take a long time for my body to switch back to its natural and healthy default, thus swinging back into a healthy rhythm once again and to get back into altruistic service to humanity a little wiser than before. I still smoke a little herb now and again to get my appetite back , along with my artistic imagination , and creating better contacts with those who have learned the highest values regarding spiritual development. I am even looking younger than I ever expected.